"Dah dah DAH dah dah dah!", she says, and army-crawls over to the cat's water dish. "Dah!" Plunges her hand in, tastes, observes the water dripping down her arm.
"DAH DAH!" Bounces on my gut, arms akimbo, then grabs my cheeks like handles and shoves my nose into her mouth.
"Dah dah daHHH!" Jazz hands with tiny, razor-sharp nails flail, graze my neck, then settle on those tiny hairs next to my ear. Yank.
While nursing, she slides her lower arm over to my arm, and PINCHES the soft inner skin.
By the end of today, my shoulders ache from restraining her, I have a diaper ointment smudge on the front of my shirt, baby spit residue on my chin, and am just the tiniest bit tense from lunging after her when I realize she's headed for the kitty litter.
Oh, baby monster. I love you.