Friday, January 5, 2007

ch ch ch changes

They're really quite dizzying--the changes these babies go through. Looking back on previous posts, Lucy is doing almost none of the things she was predictably doing before. Sleeping schedule: changed (for the worse, sigh). Nursing for forty minutes at a pop--long gone. Demanding constant attention--well, she still does that, but it's different somehow--she can go for quite a while without needing something from me.
I think she's wearing down my resistance. Before, each change brought on fear and anxiety. What will she do next? What if I can't handle it? Now, the changes are so constant and frequent, I no longer notice them. Hmmm. She's standing on her head. Interesting. I need to pee.
I think it helps that I decided I don't have the energy to vacuum and cook and dust. Some weeks, I have the energy for one of those things. (I like to cook, so that's it by default). But things are getting very cobwebby around ehre, and I don't really care so much. Hopefully Dyami can vacuum this weekend. When my day is a blank slate, i don't notice so much when I don't get 15 minutes without Baby Demands.
Plus, the dizzying rate of change helps me understand that all of these baby behaviors will end. Eventually. And everyone keeps telling me it gets easier, so I'm waiting for month six or seven. Then we'll decide if I'm really so relaxed about Lucy's demands.

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